The “Other” Woman
December 5, 2009 by J Housley
Filed under Dear Juicy
Okay Juicy Girl talk community this is hot, fresh in from the mailbag!
Dear Juicy,
I’m sick of all these married bit%&$# thinking that their shit smells like CoCo Chanel because their so-called husband has put a brass ring on it. When they find out that you’re not married they turn their noses up like they smell something putrid. Being married is obviously not all it’s cracked up to be or the divorce rate wouldn’t be so high. I am more than happy to enlighten these married snobs since they “think” their the one and only. Well, sorry to burst your little bubble but I’m here to let you all in on a secret - your man is cheating on you with me, the other woman (there are thousands of us). Yes, We are your husband’s “well kept” prize possessions. We have everything you have – beautiful kids who attend the best private school – a gorgeous home in the suburbs (not to far from you as a matter of fact) – we drive the latest soccer mom vehicle’s (Cayenne Porsche or Escalade) and have Carte blanche spending of “your” money.
The only thing that we don’t have that you do is… arguments and sleepless nights. See, We’re no trouble so he doesn’t bicker with us, we provide him with a piece of mined and solitude, he loves us and looks forward to seeing our beautiful faces, and why wouldn’t he? We do all the things that you complain about doing, won’t do, can’t do, refuse to do and no longer want to do. It seems to me that you all have forgotten exactly what it took to snag him in the first place. You’re slipping, but don’t worry, We’re making up for your shortcomings.
And no, most of us don’t work, at least not a traditional 9-5 the way you do. This is our job and it’s hard work; we need as much time as possible to stay beautiful and fit for “our” man. We work out every day, get facials every week, body scrubs, massages and waxing, (Brazilian, he likes it bare) and lots of shopping, we always have to look pretty. The only downside is that he has to spend the holidays with you and the kids, which is a minor price to pay. He feels guilty about having to be away from us so he always showers us with expensive gifts, fabulous vacations, and sparkly surprises.
Now, you may be thinking that we want these men all to ourselves right? NOT. We are more than happy to allow you to wash his dirty boxers, cook his meals and stress him out. You see, you make us a necessary commodity, he “needs us” in his life to be all the things he married you to be until you started nagging, letting yourself go and taking him for granted. So, do us a favor and be a sweetie won’t cha; keep up the good work you make this career recession proof. Maybe after reading this, you’ll stop putting you nose in the air when you meet a woman your age whose not married. Hey Juicy, would you please tell all these married women to wake up!
Signed,
Not Really the “Other” Woman
Dear “Not Really the Other Woman,”
I see that you are having a hard time dealing with the fact that you”are” the other woman, if not you would not take the time out of your busy little schedule to warn married women about the possibility of their husbands infidelity. You are obviously an adult, and therefore can do as you please, however let me warn you to air on the side of caution, if one of these – as you put it – married bit$%es finds out, I can bet there will be trouble. It truly saddens me that your type finds comfort in knowing that you are helping these men perpetuate such indiscretions. Karma is inevitable, you’d better watch out. I really feel sorry for you my dear, you lack the esteem and self confidence which enables you to believe that you could hold on to a man of your own. Sorry, I won’t be able to tell married women to “wake up” for you, but what I will do is tell you and the hundreds of women like you that you are the ones in need of a wake up call. You may all want to seek counseling to help you deal with your insecurities and the fact that you care enough about what women who “are married” think about the fact that you are NOT.
If you suspect your mate of infidelity and you are ready to know for sure visit CATCH A CHEATER
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About J Housley
Who is J. Housley?
This is me about thirty something years ago, cute huh? Even then, I always had something to talk about. I wanted to find a clever way to introduce myself to the Juicy Girl Talk community. So, I said to myself, “self, why not give the world your recipe?” And here it is, the ever-evolving recipe of me:
Mix 2 parts witty, 3/4 cups determination, 32 ounces of candor, 2 gallons of excellent friend, 1 pint seriousness, a bit of sassiness, 1/2 jug optimism, a pinch of patience, 20 years of motherhood, 20 years of hair styling, several mistakes, a heap of advice, a cauldron of opinions, a pot of craziness, a lot of lessons, 6 liters of sexiness, a scoop of fashionista, loads of understanding, a handful of assertiveness, 1/2 drip shyness, countless drops of education, an unlimited amount of love, compassion, intelligence, and generosity.
Now, throw in some brown sugar and bake, beat, blend, braise, broil, simmer, sift, shake and saute for about thirty plus years or so, or until golden brown. And there you have it, J. Housley. A little brown girl saying all the things you want to say and then some…
You tell her Juicy! These types of women are exactly the reason men get away with cheating. They don’t realize that one of these days it’s going to catch up to them and they will end up lonely and old. Then having a Brazilian won’t matter, hehe. I’m curious to know if these other women really don’t want these men or are they just saying that to make themselves feel better?
These types of women are clearly confused about life and what love is all about. If a man has a wife and he’s complaining to you about her -if you take the bait, you’re the FOOL! What else is he going to say to get in your thongs? “My wife is great, I love her and would never leave?” DUHH -NOT. Men know EXACTLY how to play women, they know that most of us are nurturing, we like to feel needed and we are very competitive with one another – couple that with some low self esteem and a few hundred compliments and complaints about the wife and they’re all in -FOOLISH FOOLS is what they are. I feel sorry for them, they’d better duck because it’s coming back around.
Ms. Housley,
Don’t forget to add low self esteem to your list of private schools, Porche’s and Escalades.
Make your own money and get your own man. Ask that married man to finance your counseling sessions the next time he drops by for the 2AM booty call.
I am truly baffled reading that mess that was posted. What is wrong with women these days?! And she is right there are countless women out there who think this behavior is correct, which in fact it isn’t okay. Flaunting around that you have someone else’s man makes you look like naive. What dream land is she living in cause in reality she is the one who is on the outs. The fact that she has to mess with SOMEONE ELSE’S man to feel validatated shows this person and everyother woman out there seriously mistaken what Love is. Marriage is a sacred thing and the man who is cheating and the other woman are going straight to hell. How can you call yourself a woman doing things like this? The wife has no downfalls, she isn’t bad for loving her husband the only thing that she doesn’t deserve is to be treated this way. So, I say to all the h*es out there, yes that is what you are, get a life. Cause Kharma is a B*%h just like it was said before, what you do will come back onto you 10x’s worse. You may think you are living the good life but just like that HE, that man that supposedly loves can take it away and where will you be then? You lean on him so much for everything it shows you aren’t a hard-working woman.
I’m not married, but I love juicy girls. They are beautiful and kind.
The problem is that they have to work all the time, so I can’t have a normal relationship with one. Someone to spend time with, cuddling, all that good stuff.
Ideal would be a nice woman who is attentive and caring, and doesn’t have to work every night. I guess I’ll have to keep looking.